Lola

it all started 3 years ago .  I already had two kids and was a single mum.  I had this guy that I fell in love with.  He was amazing.  He treated my kids well and he has a son.  All the kids loved each other.

In 2013 we had a 2 month break up and he told me he had slept with someone else but he regretted it.  We wanted to give it another try.  We decided to move in together and I got pregnant and had his child which is my third.   2 days after my son was born he told me the girl he slept with called him and told him that he has a daughter (the only girl).    I fell into deep depression yet I loved him so I tried to ignore the situation got pregnant again.

He had no job and I was struggling  working and paying a babysitter while he slept all day.  I didn’t want to have an abortion.  I was scared of raising another child with no financial help or a helping hand.  I debated till I was 14 weeks and I did the biggest mistake I could of ever done.

Now after my abortion he left me.  I cant think straight or even work.  My mind is crazy right now.  I don’t know how to cope with the loss of my baby and now him.

I feel so alone and stupid now I’m a single mum of three and I’m only 26.   Please don’t be cruel to me.  I am hurting enough right now and I just need someone to hear me out.

4 Responses to Lola

  • Amy says:

    Hi Lola, my name is Amy. I am very anti-abortion. And some people who are that way are very cruel to women who have had abortions. I will not be. U sound like you have been thru enough already. I’m very sorry for ur current situation. I know what it is like, first-hand, to be a single mom handling everything on ur own. No one there to help u, working a lot of the time and when ur not u just wanna b a good mom and be with ur kids so without having someone there to raise and take care of them with u, that pretty much means that u have absolutely no time for yourself. That part i know well. But to have all of that as your everyday and then add something to it that requires u to take time to yourself so that u can get thru it and move forward, that part I cannot imagine. I guess i can only say that i truely do feel for u and the advice that i would give consists of two things. One is, DON’T take that guy back. You’ll always think he’s gonna be different and that he’s committed to u but he will do it all over again and life is too short. And the second is, take some time like any time that u can to yourself. Go out to dinner with a girlfriend maybe and just cry out to her and tell her whats on ur mind. If u don’t do something like that, if u don’t heal yourself from this, u won’t be much good to yourself much less to ur kids. U can get thru this. I believe that women become the strongest when things in life get tough.

  • Teri says:

    Hi Amy

    I can truly relate to your story.

    I fell pregnant in May for a guy who I am deep in love with unfortunately he is married. And whilst we have both consciously tried to keep away from one another over the years our connection is powerful.

    When I told him the news his words were we must have an abortion our individual lives just could not support a child at this time. I knew this but I was torn. I had the abortion last month and I regret my decision. He has been supportive but I am grieving. I truly wish I could turn back time.

  • Kande says:

    There are a lot of places that helps women who have had an Abortion. You need healing. Please seek help.You are not alone. I wish you and your children the best.

  • Kylie says:

    I have three kids. I just had a surgical termination on friday 16th. I was 8 weeks pregnant. I suffered Hypermemis Gravidarum and was already hospitalized 3 times for four days due to vomiting. I regret every single moment of it and wish i just walked away out of their when i started to feel hesitant. I do have a partner but unsuppprtive. But the hospital advised me and then the pressure of speaking to a social worker in regards to being sick and how i feel ect i didnt know if i could do it so close to christmas and possibly be spending christmas in hospital away from my babiesni already have

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