Just after I turned 21 I started dating this guy that I thought I was truly in love with, (what a massive mistake that turned out to be).   After a couple of months I found out I was pregnant.   I told my boyfriend and he broke down in tears.   I told him we would sort something out (at that point I was willing to go through with aborting the baby, not realising how attached I would become to this unborn child).

I was booked in to have the surgery done, when I realised I didn’t want to go through with it.   I told him, and he turned to me and said that if I didn’t then I’d be at his funeral before the baby was born.. he was seriously threatening to kill himself if I didn’t terminate the pregnancy.

His mum then found out (even though he swore he didn’t tell her, I’m pretty certain it was him), and she bullied me to the point of me feeling like I’d never cope on my own, by constantly telling me I’d be a terrible parent, how stupid I was to fall pregnant and I was just trying to trap him into a relationship.

I ended up going through with the surgery, and hated myself for years… to the point that when my now husband and I were trying for a baby, which took well over a year for me to fall pregnant, then finding out at our 13 week scan that the baby had died at 8-9 weeks, I was honestly blaming myself and my previous abortion for the issues we were having 5 years later.

I hope that my story will help at least one other person..

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